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Amusing

Kids, don’t try this at home. Baylen and Jerry have a cocktail showdown at the Crispy on the Outside potluck dinner. This goes without saying, but bacon is involved. Be sure to also check out Baylen’s revolutionary double straining technique, coming soon to a craft cocktail bar near you. There’s also a mercifully short video of me making an Aviation.

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So a friend asks in relation to the financial crisis. Of course not! Atlas Shrugged is still the greatest achievement of any mind on any world in the history of the universe. It just needs a little updating.

[Via TMN.]

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Normally I’d just put something like this in the link sidebar, but I enjoyed this story about a pony getting drunk on fermented apples and falling into a lady’s swimming pool too much for that. I especially appreciated the mention of the fantastically-named Beast of Bodmin Moor.

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Thorfinn for President

by Jacob Grier on September 27, 2008

How I amused myself during the debate…

Thorfinn Hausakluif for President

Update 9/29/08: Damn, Thorfinn may have competition for the Viking vote.

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Personalization fail

by Jacob Grier on September 17, 2008

From a marketing email I received this afternoon:

Dear Jacob Grier Representative,

I found your site Jacob Grier while searching for green sites, and thought that you might be interested in what our company, [redacted].com, is doing to actively promote green practices in the restaurant industry.

10 points for using mail merge, 3 for execution.

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Nutmegged!

by Jacob Grier on September 2, 2008

An amusing story from Canada:

Ten thousand copies of a food magazine were recalled in Sweden after a mistake in one of its recipes left four people poisoned, the magazine said Thursday.

“There was a mistake in a recipe for apple cake. Instead of calling for two pinches of nutmeg it said 20 nutmeg nuts were needed,” Matmagasinet’s chief editor Ulla Cocke told AFP.

“We know that four adults ate one cake made from this recipe, and they didn’t feel well,” she said, adding that “this is obviously very regrettable.” [...]

When Matmagasinet first discovered the mistake it immediately sent out letters to its 50,000 subscribers and placed a leaflet inside the copies sold in the store, cautioning that “high doses of nutmeg can cause poisoning symptoms.”

“At first we thought this would be enough, because we didn’t really think anyone would bake or eat this cake, since so much nutmeg would give it a horrible, bitter taste, and because it is simply not that easy to get hold of that much nutmeg,” Cocke said.

An entry on this blog about the psychoactive effects of nutmeg has been a draw for Google hits, presumably from people wondering if they can get high on the spice. The short answer is you can, but it’s not pleasant. As one user put it:

I could by this time feel a warmth on my eyes and looked in the mirror to notice they were red and bloodshot, again a very familiar experience to a marijuana user. Nutmeg’s physical effects mimic the marijuana high, but the overall effect more strongly resembles flu.

But by all means, knock yourself out.

[Via BoingBoing.]

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Obligatory Labor Day post

by Jacob Grier on September 1, 2008

Barack Obama says he’ll protect American jobs. But will he?

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From The Times:

In 1977, the former Miss Wyoming stalked her lover, a Mormon missionary, to a tabernacle in East Ewell, Surrey, allegedly kidnapped him and held him in a cottage in Devon. There, the 17-stone Kirk Anderson claimed, his petite, busty admirer tied him to a bed using mink-trimmed handcuffs, slipped into a see-through nightie and forced him into sex. At a remand hearing she declared her love for the Mormon with the immortal line: “I’d ski naked down Mount Everest with a carnation up my nose if he asked me.”

Her counsel told magistrates: “Me-think the Mormon doth protest too much. You have seen the size of Mr Anderson and you have seen the size of my client.” To flee on bail, she donned a red wig and disguised herself as a member of a mime troupe, together with her alleged accomplice, Keith May. No extradition warrant was issued. William Hucklesby, the detective who led the inquiry, said: “My own view is that we were well rid of her.”

And believe it or not, the story just gets weirder from there. Could this finally inspire a suitable villain for the next Batman movie?

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Getting on the wagon

by Jacob Grier on January 23, 2008

I think this cure would leave me unfit to consume anything, not just alcohol, but it’s worth a shot if you’re desperate:

c. 1500 According to J.D. Rolleston, a British medical historian, a medieval Russian cure for drunkenness consisted in “taking a piece of pork, putting it secretly in a Jew’s bed for nine days, and then giving it to the drunkard in a pulverized form, who will turn away from drinking as a Jew would from pork.” [Quoted in Roueche, op. cit. p. 144]

The rest of the drug timeline is here.

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