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Coffee, Cocktails and Commentary
by Jacob Grier on July 26, 2007
Jacob Grier is a freelance writer, barista, mixologist, and magician in Portland, OR. He writes, eats, and drinks a lot. His articles have appeared in The Washington Post, Reason Online, The Oregonian, and other publications.
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Pandas?
Oh, the innocence of the uninitiated! When the esteemed J Grier writes the headline, “They’re Everywhere!”, it isn’t in reference to Chinese restaurants, though they are indeed everywhere. So are the Chinese, for that matter, but that’s another issue entirely (check out the ever increasing Chinese penchant for traveling abroad). The deeply disturbing trend being noted here is nothing other than “furry-ism”, i.e. being a furry. Without going into too much grotesque detail, I’ll simply mention that furries are those who make up a most curious sub-culture: people who like to dress up like various animals, and then to engage in nefarious activities in their animal costumes. All those looking to understand the finer points of this practice should direct their questions to Chad Wilcox.
I teach a class three days a week. It’s a flat fee, though I’ve been known to offer discounts for attractiveness. Not that it’s necessary; you’d be surprised how much ugly you can hide in an animal costume.