Cute, flirty female customer: “I love the way you pour the designs into the drinks.”
Me: “Thanks.”
Her: “I’ve been trying to do that at home, but I can’t get the hang of it. What do you do, just steam the milk a whole lot?”
Me: “Well, yeah. But the really important thing is that you get the milk to recirculate over itself, really working the air into it. You know, like you’re making meringue.”
*** crickets ***
Her: [Ooh, he's gay.]
Me: [Damn it!]
Me: “So, um, have a good day.”
Her: “Yeah, you too.”
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Jacob Grier is a freelance writer, barista, mixologist, and magician in Portland, OR. He writes, eats, and drinks a lot. His articles have appeared in The Washington Post, Reason Online, The Oregonian, and other publications.
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Thank you for this post Jacob. It’s the funniest and most relatable thing I’ve read in a long time.
This is definitely going in my (long-delayed) blog contest