Cute, flirty female customer: “I love the way you pour the designs into the drinks.”
Me: “Thanks.”
Her: “I’ve been trying to do that at home, but I can’t get the hang of it. What do you do, just steam the milk a whole lot?”
Me: “Well, yeah. But the really important thing is that you get the milk to recirculate over itself, really working the air into it. You know, like you’re making meringue.”
*** crickets ***
Her: [Ooh, he's gay.]
Me: [Damn it!]
Me: “So, um, have a good day.”
Her: “Yeah, you too.”
Jacob Grier is a freelance writer, bartender, cocktail consultant, and magician in Portland, Oregon. He writes, eats, and drinks a lot. His articles have appeared in the print or online editions of The Washington Post, The Atlantic, The Los Angeles Times, Reason, The Oregonian, and other publications.
Thank you for this post Jacob. It’s the funniest and most relatable thing I’ve read in a long time.
This is definitely going in my (long-delayed) blog contest