Judging by the frequency with which the word “Ugg” is showing up on the list of search phrases that lead people to my website, winter must be coming on fast. For example, the list includes the search phrase “sorority ugg” (which should really read “Sorority? Ugh!” But I digress…). As a caution to my Vanderbilt friends, I note that the list also includes the phrase “ugg nashville,” so it appears that the Vandy sorority girls are once again looking to acquire these pastel travesties for the coming winter season.
One searcher found the site with the question “Can I still wear uggs in 2005?” As she will have hopefully learned from my previous post on the subject, the answer is a resounding “no.” Wearing them in 2004 was regrettable, but wearing them in 2005 would be criminal. If you must insist on looking fashionably silly in the new year, your best bet is to wear a poncho instead.
In fact, the poncho trend seems to have already sown some confusion among the Ugg wearers, as evidenced in the search phrase “ugg gaucho boots women.” No no no no no! Gauchos don’t wear Uggs, they wear ponchos! Come on now, did Clint Eastwood wear powder blue emu boots with fluffy lining in A Fistful of Dollars? Of course not, he only dressed like that off the set.
The same goes for the person looking for “ugg american indian.” Ugg boots are an invention of the Aussies, and she’d better remember that — they get a little testy when people forget.
Finally, as a parting fashion tip from Eternal Recurrence, please don’t ever wear Uggs and ponchos together. The culture clash is just too much to bear and unless you possess the macho-panache (panacho?) of Clint Eastwood, you just won’t be able to pull it off.