After a long conversation with several oh-so-earnest Portland Obama supporters last night — the kind of group in which predicting the existential end of the United States within 20 years if he loses doesn’t cause anyone to bat an eye — I was reminded of my fantasy election. As much as I dislike Hillary Clinton, I harbor a secret wish that she were the Democratic nominee. She has no cult of personality. She’s not fooling anybody. Most normally intelligent people’s brains don’t turn to mush when they envision her in office. Even with Democratic control of Congress, another President Clinton would have at least ensured that the partisan rancor and distrust of government Bush has worked so hard to achieve would not be squandered.
And on the Republican side, as long as they’re going to tank the election anyway, couldn’t they have thrown Ron Paul on the ticket? Never mind that he’d be crushed, at least the debates would have been interesting.
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Jacob Grier is a freelance writer, barista, mixologist, and magician in Portland, OR. He writes, eats, and drinks a lot. His articles have appeared in The Washington Post, Reason Online, The Oregonian, and other publications.
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