President Bush announced today his plans for colonizing, I mean pre-emptively striking, our red neighbor Mars. “Once our troops have penetrated the Martian defense lines, it’s only a matter of time before we are able to penetrate Uranus,” said the Commander in Chief. Robert Saunders has the full story in the year’s first issue of The Slant.
Speaking of The Slant, writer and frequent commenter on this site Andrew Collazzi (a.k.a. my enemy Taco Boy) has begun his own weblog. His first post is entitled “I blame JaRo,” so I guess this travesty is my fault.
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Jacob Grier is a freelance writer, barista, mixologist, and magician in Portland, OR. He writes, eats, and drinks a lot. His articles have appeared in The Washington Post, Reason Online, The Oregonian, and other publications.
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I don’t have to stand for this Queso Crusher!!! I’ll… oh what the hell, I’m just gonna eat some tacos.